Thursday, September 6, 2007

The Proverbial Fork

So now that I've pinpointed the source of so much of my anger these days, what the hell am I supposed to do about it? It seems to be a lose-lose situation. Of course, I can't go into a single detail about it for different reasons, but it's a situation I can't remove myself from without losing myself even more than I already have.

Now that my anger is starting to show more and I'm directing it toward other people, I know that something has to change, but I don't know what and I don't know how. I'm afraid if I change my current situation I will become more angry and bitter at the world. On the other hand if I continue with it, the only foreseeable outcome is continued anger.

The problem is that it seems like the times I'm my happiest are the times that are also the source for so many raw emotions. I feel as though I'm at a fork in the road. The road goes right or left, but each option only holds pain. The choice I want to make is to go up, but I don't know how to do that. I'm just completely and totally lost.

So I guess all I can do right now is sit at the fork and be still and silent until the answer comes.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I wish I could help.
You know I'm here if you need to talk/bitch/moan/whine/
complain/vent/etc...

Love you.